I've Been Away....

From my writing.  I apologize to those of you who've been wondering where I got to.  I've been here, right at home, but struggling with some of the issues my children have and trying to find a way to actually cope with the waiting for our new children.  We've also had some issues to deal with where our SW is concerned.  We still don't have one...well...we do and we don't.

So, first of all my children's issues.  Our oldest is doing pretty well.  He's had a couple of minor skirmishes at school which he's handled well, and when he comes home he suddenly thinks he's the parent of his little brother. That is a minor issue to deal with.  We just keep reminding him that he's not the parent and that we are and he can go ahead and just be a kid and big brother.  He doesn't have to worry about the grown up responsibilities that he's tried to take on.  He's getting there and we're proud of him.
This year back in public school he's doing so well.  We get notes and calls from his teacher and his principal telling us how proud of him they are and just how well he's doing and how quickly he settled into the routine.  We're all so very proud of him!
Then there's our little one.  Well now, his behaviours leave something to be desired.  He's all over the map!  Taking him out of the house is completely exhausting and at times quite embarrassing, but we're overcoming the embarrassment and learning to ignore the general public who just don't know what's going on.  I heard about making a business size card that tells people your child is special needs and that at the moment you need all your energy and attention for your child, but if they'd like to learn more they can call you.  It has your name and phone number and you just hand it to those who are staring or making comments when your child/ren are crashing in public.  I think I'm going to do that.  Anyway, right now taking my youngest anywhere is a huge hassle.  His behaviours are like that of a 2 year old only multiplied by about 10,000.  The only medication we have him on is to sleep and that is causing him night terrors.  So he's coming off that now.  I'm going to be scheduling an appointment with our paediatrician tomorrow morning so that we can discuss other alternatives to his sleep disorder and his daytime behaviours.  At home he's pretty good, just busy, but really very well behaved.  Unless of course he's seeking attention, then we have to ignore him for hours on end because he doesn't give up!
So that's my daily life with my kids.  All in all, not bad at all, just tiring.

So, it's been over a year now since we were approved to adopt a sibling group.  We never thought it would take this long.  We did have to say no to one sibling group but only because we felt we didn't have the one resource one of the children would need.  We won't take a child we can't provide properly for all of their needs.  It's not fair to the children or right.  We are extremely picky about the professionals we allow into our children's lives.  What this one child needed is here but we don't approve of the source of the help.  The closest resource was too far away and would keep me from the other 3 children too many days a month.  Not fair and not right.
But since that duo, there's been no others that apparently would fit with us or us with them.  It's hard to believe when there are so many sibling groups available for adoption right now.  But, that's the way it is and we have to accept it.  It's not easy but we're focusing on our children and living for today and for not what tomorrow may bring.  Live for the present.  It's my daily mantra.

Our SW issue.  We have a very nice temporary worker who works out of a different community and has a very large caseload.  We don't think we're a priority for her.  It makes us feel out of sorts.  We're not close to this person like we've been with our other workers.  We were at a matching event a few weeks ago and even there we noticed we weren't at the top of this worker's list.  They were definitely very busy with a couple of other families that were there.  We did approach one worker about a sibling group she presented, but we knew from the get go that IF we were considered at all it would only be as a back up family for the children.
So the other part of the SW issue is that we know and have met the new worker for our community.  That's awesome right?  No.  The worker that has been hired to take over our community isn't certified/qualified to do the job yet.  Which means that she can't look for matches for us or help us approach other workers.  We're not even supposed to really know about her from what we've been told.
So here I sit full of confusion.  Friends of ours have a different temporary worker who told them they ARE to connect with the new worker for here and have her look for matches for them and then if they find one the temporary worker will complete the rest of the steps.  Confusion reigns triumphant here!

So there you have it.  With all that's been going on with the kids and the worker situation and the rest of our daily lives I just haven't felt much like writing.  I have a friend who also writes an adoption blog who writes daily to help her deal with her emotions and I wish I had that ability.  It's something I'm going to work on.  Writing daily to help me.  I think it will be therapeutic.  And there ain't nothing wrong with therapy!

Have a great night and I'll try to write more tomorrow.

God Bless you all!