How am I doing? Well, physically I'm doing great! Emotionally, I'm OK. I'd like to say great but that wouldn't be the truth. So why am I just OK? Let me tell you.
We're still waiting. In case you're new here, we're waiting for an adoption placement.
Now, this isn't our first time on the roller coaster it's our 3rd. The waiting at any stage of adoption is hard. But it seems to be particularly difficult in the final stage. The stage after the application is accepted, the home study is done and approved and all you have left is the wait for the match. The wait for the phone call that has your ASW on the other end of the line saying, "I've found your child!" This is the hardest part.
Today is particularly hard. Mostly because I got that call. Well sort of. Our ASW called but it wasn't to say she found our children. It was to say that we'd been turned down for another sibling group. I guess this one was harder because it wasn't that the children had been placed just that their worker felt we weren't the right match. See when we get the call that says, "Sorry you weren't chosen, because the children have been placed." That is bittersweet. I get happy because children I was aware of and hoped to bring home, got a forever family. That makes me happy. But I get sad too because the children I hoped to bring home aren't coming. So we're back to waiting.
It's been 3 long years since the beginning. Just over 2 years since we've been waiting to be matched. We had a few months when we were on 'unofficial hold' while we had our home study updated, and got to know our new worker. This ride on the roller coaster just seems longer and more up and down.
So, this weekend we're off to another matching event. I'm hoping we finally find our child or children at this one.
We are a very strong christian family and we believe that our children will come when God says it's time, we're just wishing his clock worked more like ours. *Sigh* In His time. That's what keeps us going; that and the great support network we have. When you have a fantastic support network like ours, you just don't get stressed out all that much.
What keeps you going?
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