Progress...

So the other day I told you about having figured out how to be the squeaky wheel.  Well as it turns out (and as I look back over the week) it was all God.  Each and every day last week He gave me the reason to contact my adoption social worker.  So this week, I’m sitting here and as a wise friend reminded me: Psalm 37:7 “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.”

I received a message from my worker yesterday informing me that 2 searches for children did not pan out but that she will check on them again in a month or so, IF we’re still looking.

So that makes me hopeful that I can indeed remember to be still and wait patiently and His will will be done.  Now I know that some of you are probably not Christians or faith based of any kind, but my family is and this why I talk about God.  If it bothers you I’m sorry but I won’t change my faith to not upset others.

My hubby and I decided to take this journey wholly based on our faith.  We prayed and prayed and listened quietly for God to lead us in His direction.  If we hadn’t we wouldn’t have the beautiful children we have now.  Now we are on that path again.  We prayed (and still pray) and listened (and still listen) and truly feel that God is guiding us to another or more children who need us and whom we need.  We are so blessed to be able to build our family through adoption.  It is a struggle.  It is an emotional roller coaster.  It is a test of your faith.  It is an amazing reward at the end when you bring your child/ren home.  Don’t believe me?  Go ask a friend of ours who is bringing home their new family member today.  They waited what felt like forever too.  Today is the culmination of all the emotions that they had to go through and process and endure.  Today they get their reward and so does their child.  CONGRATULATIONS!! (I hope they’re reading this.)

So why would I consider 2 refusals progress?  Because it means that we’re at the forefront of our workers minds, and that God is getting ready to grant our hearts desires.  When you’ve gone as long as we have without any movement whatsoever, 2 refusals IS progress!  Progress that we’re happy about!

So if you’re thinking of throwing in the towel because you’ve been waiting forever and nothing is happening, hold on!  Go talk to someone who is where you are, or has been where you are.  Find a support group for pre and post adoptive parents.  Believe me it helps!  If you’re in my neck of the woods, the group I facilitate for the AFA BC meets every 3^rd Monday of each month.  Send me a message and I’ll send you the reminders.  You don’t have to wait alone.  We’re out here too.

Have a great day and God Bless you all.

Squeaky Wheel...

Well I must say that God works in mysterious ways.  Not too many days ago I was feeling completely lost and in despair about our adoption journey.  Then this week, God has provided a reason to call my adoption worker everyday!  I'm sure she is getting tired of hearing my voice and seeing her inbox flooded with emails from me.

The good thing is is that not every conversation has been about adoption, directly.  One has been about funding for an Autism Conference being held next month in a close neighbouring community, but there is no way I can afford the fees to go without funding help.  Unfortunately, MCFD doesn't do that.  They apparently really don't like to do funding for their own staff to go to these types of conferences for education either.  Oh well.  Talking to my worker on the phone gave us another chance to get to know each other a wee bit better; which was really nice.

Another reason was to find out if she would be upset or offended if I contacted a private adoption agency that is publicly promoting ministry children.  The only reason I even asked was because both of my workers were on holidays and there were 2 beautiful little sisters that were being publicly profiled.  My hubby and I wanted more information.  By the time I was able to decide if I wanted to take the chance that our workers would be miffed at us, they were back and my local worker checked and the little ones had already found their forever family.  YAY for them! So happy when I know that waiting children are getting placed.

Yet another reason was because the bulletin got updated and there were children on it that we are very interested in.  Will we be granted the privilege of adopting these children?  That's up to God.  We're praying for His will at His time.  Even though we wish His timing was much more in sync with ours.  But I think God has a great sense of humour and this is His was of making us practice patience.  We're trying Lord, we're trying.

So another reason was to find out about our home-study update.  It's being reviewed and waiting for our criminal records check to come back.  Nothing's changed with anything so once the check is back everything will be full steam ahead again.  Oh yeah when you're adopting you have to have everything updated every year.

So last night it was funny when my hubby asked what reason I would have to call our worker today.  I said I don't know, but God will give me a reason.  He did.

With all the action this week I feel confident that our children or child is on their way.  Soon.

So if you're a waiting parent and feeling the frustration of the ages, believe me I understand.  Just hang in there.  Your kids are coming.  You want them to be the right kids not just kids because you're desperate.  That's no good for anyone.  Deep breathing exercises have helped me, give that a try.  It also doesn't hurt to be the squeaky wheel.  It usually gets the grease.

Have a great night and God Bless you all!

Bulletin Profiles...

My husband and I were sitting here this morning having our morning coffee and enjoying our conversation time.  One of our topics was the bulletin.  Here are our thoughts:

We were discussing how the bulletin doesn't get updated very often.  With us being in the process of looking (waiting) for our next child(ren), we find it odd that the bulletin profiles are so very out of date.  We were pondering the fact that families who are profiled and waiting have to update their homestudies once a year, yet there are children on the bulletin who haven't been updated in 5 or 6 years!  How is this right?

For example, there is one particular child whose profile starts with "So and so is about to turn 1! Imagine all the milestones you would get to witness and enjoy with them." When you look up to the birthdate that child is going to turn 6 this summer!  How is it right that that child's profile is 5 years or more out of date?! (Summarized)

Now understand that we understand that ALL workers have large caseloads and are very busy, but they have to check on these children at least once a year, couldn't they then take a picture and update the profile?  Then submit the revised profile for upload?  If families have to keep their homestudies up to date why shouldn't the children's profiles be up to date?  Wouldn't it be easier to find families for these beautiful, waiting children when the prospective parents have current information about their needs?

Even at matching events the children who are profiled (some not all) are quite often presented with out of date profiles.
For example, we were recently at a matching event and one of the children profiled was 10 or 11 years old but their printed profile was from the age of 4 or 5 years old.  I ask you, how is this right?  How are you going to find families for these children when you aren't presenting current information?

Speaking from personal experience my husband and I were considering some children and their proposal package contained tonnes and tonnes of information but the information wasn't current.  The children were 8 and 10 years old, but the information stopped when they were 3 and 5 years old.  Even in a proposal package the information wasn't kept current.  We pointed that out to our then worker and she went and got us the more current information.  Unfortunately those children weren't a fit for us and we weren't a fit for them.  They have since been adopted by a wonderful family! Praise the Lord!

So, I'm just sitting here wondering how I can go about helping the children of our province that are waiting for forever families get there.  Is there any way that I can help the workers?  If there is, please let me know.  I'm more than willing to do whatever it takes to get BC's Waiting Children into their forever families.

Have a great day and God Bless you all!

I Need Help...

So I borrowed this picture from a friend.  Thank you!  But today it hit home for me.  Actually it was late last night.  I have always known that those people who are there for everybody are the ones who need someone the most.

Lately, that's me.  I am not a whiner.  I don't complain.  Oh sure, every once in a while I will tell someone that I'm ticked off about something, or I'll confide that I'm not exactly happy but somewhere in that process I'll also make it sound like it's no big deal.

Honestly, I think it's time I stopped being that person who doesn't ask for help.  Or rather maybe it's the way I ask for help.  I keep hearing that asking for help is a sign of strength.  Personally, I believe it is.  For others.  For me, not so much.  So when I reach out to certain people maybe they don't realize that's what I'm doing.  So them not responding to me is my fault.  Mostly because the people I've been calling on lately don't know me all that well.  So I guess I'll have to be more blunt.  Yeah right...that is NOT going to happen.

Then there are those who have known me for a very long time and if you ask them what it's like if they try to find out if I'm OK, they'll tell you it's like pulling teeth, or that I'm fine.

I am someone who has, for my entire talking life, been there for everyone.  Perfect strangers will start talking to me about their problems in the grocery store line up. So for me it's just a natural thing to listen and help others when I can.

Now, it's my turn.  I need help.  I have asked some very specific people for help.  Those who are in the know.  Those who are in a position to help.  Those that are also extremely busy.  I understand that, I truly, honestly do.  I think my problem with them being extremely busy and brushing me off, if they answer at all, is that no matter what I'm doing if someone calls for help, I drop everything and I do mean everything, and give them my undivided attention.  The only thing that trumps me helping someone is my kids.  Even then my kid has to be in dire need for me to interrupt a person that needs my help.

I guess because my dad was a natural counselor and I seem to be one too, I have a hard time asking for help.  I see asking for help as a sign of strength; a sign of recognizing one's own limits; but when I do finally swallow my pride (yes my pride because I don't like to bother other people) and reach out for assistance and get brushed off, the next time I need help it will be even harder to ask again.

So, I guess my message here is if someone is asking for help, don't brush them off, if you can't make time immediately then set a time.  You don't know the difference you might be making in someone's life.

Good Friday...

Yes it is!  After last night I'm grateful for Good Friday morning.  So far!


In a little while my beautiful boys are going to get up and my day is going to start.  I'm hoping for a day full of sunshine so that I can dress them and ship them out the back door.  


I'll start with Thursday night.  DH and I stepped out onto our back patio for a cup of tea and a breather after dinner.  Our oldest was sent to his room (he'd not had a great day since he got home from school) and the little one was in our clear line of sight watching Handy Manny.  We weren't outside more than 10 minutes and when we came in the sight we beheld was incredible!  Apparently our little one had managed to (now keep in mind I was watching him the whole time except for maybe a second or two) climb on top of our fridge (which is gated in the kitchen, the area the little one can not access) grab a bottle of baby powder, ( you see where this is going don't you?) get back down and grab a jar of very expensive butt cream, and proceed to cover my livingroom floor, walls, furniture, toys and himself!  Now if it hadn't been such an upsetting afternoon with the boys I probably would have laughed, and so would my hubby, but not then.  Angry was the flavour of the moment.  (Which is what facilitated the extremely quick clean up.) The little one, once cleaned up, was put in a time out, and then handed a cloth to help clean up. Not that he was much help.  But we have to learn from our mistakes and hopefully he'll learn something from his.


After I cleaned up the boy, and my oldest started helping daddy get the powder off our hardwood floors (that now have bright white seams in a dark wood floor), and trying desperately to get the water-proof butt cream off the fabric furniture, we all calmed down.  The livingroom is clean and my house smells baby powder fresh.  So I guess there is a silver lining to this (powder) cloud!


Have a great day and God Bless you!